Children in parent’s ego EMI traps
When I say parents put kids in EMI traps, I mean the guys (like me) born in the 1950s, 60s whose children have started earning….and sadly turn to their parents for advise.
Well it happens like this…
A guy born in the late ’70s or early ’80s starts earning. He first goes and buys a nice motorbike – and for that he is happily paying an EMI. Age 24 to age 27 years…and the boy is happy.
Now the pressure starts…’You are earning so well, why do you not get married’…and at age 28 that pressure translates to marriage – arranged by elders, or arranged by youngsters themselves.
Now the EMI pressure starts…’Will you take your wife with all that silk saree…and jewellery…in your bike?’ you ought to be mad. To this the father in law offers ‘Yes yes…when we were young such good EMI for cars were not available..I had to wait for the company car. It came at my age of 42’ or some such shit.
This pressure then turns to blackmail when the girl gets pregnant. That is the last straw…he HAS to buy a car. So another EMI starts.
Then the collective ego of the whole society takes over. There is pressure to buy a house. Why should he buy a house? Because his father, father-in-law, ….and every uncle, aunt, ….will feel good. So suddenly the wife will also (brainwashed by ‘society’) will say ‘When our kid is born, the kid should come to our own house’.
So now one more EMI has got added on…the housing EMI. If he protests, the father will say ‘I will put Rs. 200,000 in the down payments…or some such shit’. So pile on a Rs. 75,00,000 house has been committed to. Down payment Rs. 7,50,000 – dad pays partly, Husband and Wife clean out all their accounts and the ‘house’ has been bought. EMI? Rs. 67,000. The guys income of Rs. 134,000 is now eaten up 50% by the housing emi, Rs. 12,700 car EMI, society charges….etc etc. the monthly surplus is about Rs. 1348…and the wife’s take home is about Rs. 65,000 – which can be used for …..
The wife having connived with her parents (for the kid), and her in-laws (for the house) is ecstatic that they now have a baby on the way, a new car (it is so hot how people travel by bus and train, OMG), a new house…
She goes to the gynaec – and he says…it is better that you take rest…..complications….
She comes back and asks her husband very sweetly ‘Can I leave my job?’. LOL.
The guy has been had. He cannot even think of taking sick leave. If he takes one day off, he cannot pay all his EMIs. LOL
Vishnu
Subra,
You captured the scene as real as it could be.
Regards,
Vishnu
Raj
Subra,
PPFAS seems to have copied this article for their article.
Please see the link below
https://www.ppfas.com/research/ereports/week/100912/#money
Some Relevant points
“A guy born in the late 70’s or early 80’s starts earning in an Information Technology company”
“Will you take your wife with all that silk saree and jewellery in your bike?”
-Raj
-Hari
MANU VIKRAM SINGH
Very Very Good POST.
Just one thing – I am 26 year old guy and luckily I got to read a lot of stuff on PF, just around the time I started Earning 2yrs back. Now I have a substantial amount of Saving + Investments + Insurance, that too without compromising on my Needs & Wants.
After, 2 years I have figured out that being “Patient” towards your “Purchases” is the single most important thing if one wants to be rich.
Before any kind of Purchase, either small or big, I remind myself that – Only Accumulate STUFF as much as you can HANDLE. This way I never let Societal Pressure overpower me.
I think most people of my generation need to understand this concept, so that they live happily without any financial burden.
Rohit
Fantastic article, Subra !
I know this to be the life story of many of my friends – with a change in the earning figures, but the plot being intact.
I know a hell lot of friends who don’t have a saving of 50k after 4/5 yrs of job with a 5Lakh package (at the end of 4th or 5th year).
kuldeep
subra,
sometimes I feel the examples you quote about people earning 2 lacs or 3 lacs per month are not practical for average crowd reading blog.
We are still earning as 7-8 lacs per year. please think about it
vadakkus
I have a EMI-free (second hand) car which I bought off my savings in cash and have decided never to buy a house. I am happy living in rented apartments, and all peer and other pressure putting people have been shown their place. One just has to have the guts to stand up to the “elders” who think they are all wise and the World still works how it did 30 years ago.
I had to write three articles to convince people why I am not buying an apartment. http://vadakkus.com/2013/03/11/buying-flat-bangalore/
Vinayak
This article is nice and pretty much a common story these days. One of the best books on personal finance that would help everyone to make proper judgement and take right decisions, is “Rich Dad Poor Dad” by Robert T Kiyosaki. It’s a must read for anyone considering earning money i.e. everyone 🙂
scorpfromhell
This is exactly my story too: Bike EMI > Car EMI (small car) > Home EMI (My dad has two houses)
Only saving grace: my wife was not earning before, but now she is (actually she has taken a brief hiatus to set up her own school).
Now I can’t think of becoming an entrepreneur myself as I had initially planned before getting employed.
Kalyani
He he he !!! Good one… Of course there are parents who want the son, who is earning well, has 1-2 EMIs going for his own house (can afford it) to buyout their own house coz their coffers are empty.. Reverse mortgage they don’t trust , and expect the son to feed them endlessly on their rather inflated lifestyle at 65+. You should do a post on such poor kids also, Subra !! Or have you already ??!!! (( you know whom I am talking abt right ??!!))) :-)))
Karthikeyan
This is SO TRUE. The world is so uncertain these days. We dont even know if we are going to live in same city – or even same country in the next few years. It is not wise to invest so much in a house. Frankly we dont even know if married relationship would ever last long enough. There are so many divorces and after getting home loan if there s going to be divorce, the most of the properties go to wife due to hypocritic law. We have to live life happy every moment and for that we have to be debt free.
Satish
Hey subra,
I have been reading your daily dose of retirement medicine from past 6 months.. but this article is actually representation of all my life incidents… yes multiple EMI and society are pain…:( . All i want a peace of mind but it has become pieces of EMI…
Savithri
The real picture of the present day scenario being explained as it is. Feels sorry for those guys who gives importance to his EGO and social status and fails to think about the pros and cons of the same.
Amardeep Vasant Shinde
Same story will get repeated years and decades coz very few can take pressure from society, relatives and in-laws. We can change it if personal finance is introduced as compulsory subject from class 8 to class 10 and basic things like daily record keeping of expenditure, savings, compounding and channelling it into good,safe and risky investment is thought. As long as it is not thought every person will be fed with same advise.